Sotonye
1 min readMar 29, 2020

The Illusion of Choice

“Tade I want you to choose me, consciously, intentionally. I want you to love me the way that I love you, wholly. I see when you look at her, the way that you look at her, and I don’t want you to stay with me if you’d rather go to her. If you choose her I’ll be fine, I promise. Yes it’ll hurt, but it’ll be much worse if you stay but your heart is somewhere else; if you stay because you feel you don’t have a choice. So I’m giving you your freedom, go, explore, and when you’re done, if you want to come back, I’ll be here.”

“So what will happen to me, to everything, if I choose her? If I go out and realise what’s out there is what I want? My job? My apartment? My finances?”

“Well Tade, if you go with her, you’ll lose access to those things. I don’t want to do this, but it’s the rule. You can’t enjoy the benefits of being with me, while you’re with her.”

“But you said I have a choice? Freewill? Where does that come in? Besides you made this rule.”

“You have a choice Tade; it’s me or certain death.”

“How is that a choice?”

“I don’t know, it’s just the way things are.”

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Sotonye
Sotonye

Written by Sotonye

Queer Feminist writer and activist.

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